When people trust their leader, they’re willing to undertake change even if it scares them.
When they don’t feel that trust, transition is much less likely to occur.
The good news is that you can build trust, the bad news is that it takes time.
- Do what you say will do. Don’t make promises you can’t or won’t keep. Mostly people’s mistrust has come from the untrustworthy actions of others in the past.
- If for any reason you cannot follow through on a promise, warn the person as soon as the situation becomes clear to you, and explain the circumstances that led to your failure to do what you promised.
- Listen to people carefully and tell them that you think they are saying. If you have it wrong, accept the correction and revise what you say. People trust most the people whom they believe understand them.
- Understand what matters to people and work hard to protect anything that is related to what matters to them. People trust those who are looking out for their best interests.
- Share yourself honestly. A lot of mistrust begins when people are unable to read you. And remember: while hiding your shortcomings may polish your image, it ultimately undermines people’s trust in you. Admitting an untrustworthy action is in itself a trustworthy action.
- Ask for feedback and acknowledge unasked-for feedback on the subject of your own trustworthiness whenever it is given.
Regard it as valuable information and reflect on it.
Feedback may be biased, and you don’t have to swallow it whole. But check it for important half-truths. - Don’t try to push others to trust you further than you trust them.
You will communicate subtly whatever mistrust you are feeling, and it will be returned to you in kind.
Trust is mutual, or else it is very shallow. - Try extending your trust of others a little further that you normally would. Being trusted makes a person more trustworthy, and more trustworthy people are more trusting.
- Don’t confuse being trustworthy with “being a friend”.
Being a friend for any purposes beside friendship is an untrustworthy act.
Besides trust doesn’t automatically come with friendship. - Don’t be surprised if your trust-building project is viewed suspiciously. Asking people to let go of their old mistrust of managers (and of you in particular) puts them into a significant (and dangerous-feeling) transition. Their mistrust – justified or not – was a form of self protection, and no-one gives up self protection easily.
- If all of this is too complicated to remember and you want a single key to the building of trust, just remind yourself, “Tell the truth.”
Every hour mistrust continues makes transition more difficult to manage than it has been.
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